Lead a Circle Learn more about Circles. More resources. Build new skills—from public speaking to team-building—using these expert talks and career resources. Get key takeaways from our annual report about the state of women in corporate America. Your email address will not be published. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. And it starts now. Submit a Comment Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. Women do not negotiate for themselves in the workforce.
A study in the last two years of people entering the workforce out of college showed that 57 percent of boys entering, or men, I guess, are negotiating their first salary, and only seven percent of women.
And most importantly, men attribute their success to themselves, and women attribute it to other external factors. If you ask men why they did a good job, they'll say, "I'm awesome. Why are you even asking? Why does this matter? Boy, it matters a lot. Because no one gets to the corner office by sitting on the side, not at the table, and no one gets the promotion if they don't think they deserve their success, or they don't even understand their own success.
I wish the answer were easy. I wish I could go tell all the young women I work for, these fabulous women, "Believe in yourself and negotiate for yourself.
Own your own success. But it's not that simple. Because what the data shows, above all else, is one thing, which is that success and likeability are positively correlated for men and negatively correlated for women.
And everyone's nodding, because we all know this to be true. There's a really good study that shows this really well. And she's an operator in a company in Silicon Valley, and she uses her contacts to become a very successful venture capitalist. In — not so long ago — a professor who was then at Columbia University took that case and made it [Howard] Roizen.
And he gave the case out, both of them, to two groups of students. He changed exactly one word: "Heidi" to "Howard. He then surveyed the students, and the good news was the students, both men and women, thought Heidi and Howard were equally competent, and that's good.
The bad news was that everyone liked Howard. He's a great guy. You want to work for him. You want to spend the day fishing with him.
But Heidi? Not so sure. She's a little out for herself. She's a little political. You're not sure you'd want to work for her. This is the complication. We have to tell our daughters and our colleagues, we have to tell ourselves to believe we got the A, to reach for the promotion, to sit at the table, and we have to do it in a world where, for them, there are sacrifices they will make for that, even though for their brothers, there are not.
The saddest thing about all of this is that it's really hard to remember this. And I'm about to tell a story which is truly embarrassing for me, but I think important. I gave this talk at Facebook not so long ago to about employees, and a couple hours later, there was a young woman who works there sitting outside my little desk, and she wanted to talk to me. I said, okay, and she sat down, and we talked. And she said, "I learned something today. I learned that I need to keep my hand up.
I had my hand up with many other people, and you took two more questions. Yet, Sheryl Sandberg leaves us with three clear messages. Number one, sit at the table and own your own success. Number two, make your partner a real partner. And, number three, keep your foot on the gas pedal until the day you really have to leave. Gender Equality RSC Share it: When we talk about the gender gap, we tend to think straight away to the difference between women and men when it comes to salaries, the number of leaders and participation in the workplace.
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